I see posts, I see people, I hear about her/him doing this, that and the other.
"How can she/he do that?"
"How are they that good?"
"Are they natural though?"
"Did they just get lucky?"
"Why can I NOT do that yet?"
"How do they look like that?"
"Are they better than me?”
- Jack Smith 2015
I’m from a very proud city, with high ambitions to be the best at whatever we do, but this seems to make things tough at times, you can easy fall into the ‘perfection’ circle, of which it could be a materialistic world or “don’t you know who they are?” kind of person, which can get very obsessive and also too much - the thought of imperfection can completely change the way you look and feel about yourself. Comparing yourself to others, boasting about materials, filtering body parts… if it’s not perfect it's not worth flaunting (apparently). This can leave one very unhappy mind.
Remember in school, there was always that person that was just great at everything? Great at sports, intelligent, always well-groomed looking pristine. Which is fantastic by the way, but WOW, how hard was it to keep up with them?
That very person in my school had everything plus more, although they didn’t know this about themselves. They basically landed on their feet from the get go and they even had a well paid job before we even completed our school years!
10 years later, I received a message “can I come in the studio for a chat, a catch-up?” It had been a long time but I was keen… they come in, and within 2 minutes of our chat, they got straight to the point…
“Jack, I’ve seen all of your videos, pictures online, I want YOU to train me” WOW. Yes THAT has-it-all person has asked me to train them! I was overwhelmed to say the least.
We never had a rivalry, but I was always competitive and they was just better at most things than me. I’ve worked hard at what I do for 10 years, I’m feeling and looking great and I know I’m nowhere near my peak level. I’m also beyond competing with others - not in a race sort of way, in a “are they better than me?” sort of way. I focus on becoming my best, for me, I push Jack Smith because I really want to maximise potential. Yes, I absolutely love compliments, who doesn’t? But it’s rare you find me in a commercial gym screaming around (metaphorically) “look at me, look at what I can do”
Ethan and I spend most days educating individuals, schools and companies on mental health and wellbeing and one of the main symptoms of your state of mind is overthinking. Overthinking what people think of you, what they say, what they’re doing. It can completely take over your life. It does sound a little exaggerated and dramatic, but this really does happen. It happens to great people too, they get lost in the circle of trying to show they live a perfect life.
Social media, brilliant for advertising, nosing at other people and for most pretending something that you're not. Society has spents decades shoving the idea of 'perfection' down our necks by brainwashing (or gas lighting) us with magazines, runways, billboards. now social media has become a giant network for people to post pics that may be slightly similar to these 'role models' people have convinced themselves are the perfect ones.
Social media is fantastic, but can also be the devil. A whole world of complete lies to which match ALL the questions above. This can lead into one of the biggest, saddest feeling in the world. OVERTHINKING.
So if it makes you tiny bit happier posting pics of you with a great angle or looking superfly, imagine how happy you could be if you were like that in real life. Mentally happier, physically better, always improving.
Mentally, overworking your mind can be one of the most draining things you can do. Stay focused on being positive and remember don't be ashamed to talk, there is alot of people out there who will listen! :)
There are things that you are great at, there are things you want to be great at, these things don’t happen over night and they didn’t to the person you’re overlooking. Great things take time, be happy with your progress, be yourself throughout your life, enjoy the road and eventually you’ll be there without even realising.
The more you comprehend that you’re in it for you and NOT to gain other peoples approval, the quicker you’ll start enjoying the journey to exactly how you want to live! Yes I still have a few issues with a ego every now and again but considering how big it was I’ve more than chopped it in half which is huge for me. If you are that person in the bubble of perfection of peoples opinions then take small steps to become who you really are.
Yes, be great at everything you do in life, but also, accept who you are, you ARE unique, discover your weaknesses and make them stronger, practice the things you’re uncomfortable with and always keep the mind healthy and active.
STAY HAPPY, LIVE HEALTHY, BE ACTIVE